Having my way with Ulysses

A beacon ever to the stormtossed heart of man, Mary, star of the sea.

Qui donc, si ce n'est un homme, vous a mis dans cette fichue position? C'est le pigeon, Joseph.Holy Mother Public Relations
8:00 pm
 

Recording No. 1132.  The memoirs of Mary, Holy Virgin, Mother of God, Star of the Sea, Pillar of Ivory, Mystical Rose, Beloved among Joseph are you recording all that shit?  Holy Je, uh.  Shit!  Can’t say the bloody kid’s name or he shows up every damn time.  Chrackers!  It’s just not the same.  Get on with it for the love of before I forget what I want to say and CEO Holy Mother Public Relations.  Memoir notes.

Mary:  Can you hear me?  Start?  Right.  The rite of Onella, the torch-light.  So he’s ready but you’re not.  And then he thinks, better wait and now you’re in bed with a man holding back for all he’s worth.  Just what we’re looking for from a man, eh chicas?  There he is teetering and then 32 feet per second per second takes over and now he’s falling.  Or he’s in that kairotic sweet spot between potential and kinetic and hey look at me, I’m extending the moment.  Nooooooooooow.  But just for you buddy.  Give me rising, not falling.  So I push and out with him.  Girls, size them up before you let them in your bed, you listening?  Talk to each other, tell your sisters what he does and won’t do. Life is too short to let any cholo climb in your windows just because he looks good and has flowers. Telling you about the motion of the ocean. It’s the size of the wave, girls, and unless you talk to each other, you don’t know what you’re getting.

Joseph:  Mary?  Mary, can you hold off?  For just a minute?  Having some technical difficulties with the equipment.

Mary:  He think’s a minute is enough.

Leavetaking

Where there is desire, the power relation is already present: an illusion, then to denounce this relation for a repression exerted after the event; but vanity as well, to go questing after a desire that is beyond the reach of power.11:32 pm

I won’t get my nose bent out of shape about it, and here’s the snub.  Invisibility is a trap.  Let’s make no illusions about it.  But instead of entering into the symbolic order, the invisible wafts around the edges of it wanting.  And whatever is in can be as ugly as homemade sin, but the invisible wafts close.  Look at me.  Can you see me now?  Can you see me no?   No entry.  Don’t mind me, just passing by.  I’ll just take a look at myself in this covered mirror, check if all visible light bends around me.  I look.  Don’t look like I did when I didn’t know my own effect.  Doesn’t matter.  No matter.  Just a bit of insubstantiality, don’t mind me.  I’ll just.  Well, taking off.  On my way now.  Going.  I’ll just be heading.  What’s that?  Oh, I thought you were talking to me.  Ok then.  I’ll see you.  I’ll see you.

Car Ride

Free from the I and Mine, from agression, arrogance, greed, desire, and anger, he is fit for the state of absolute freedom. Serene in this state of freedom, beyond desire and sorrow, seeing all beings as equal, he attains true devotion to me. By devotion he comes to realize the meaning of my infinite vastness; when he knows who I truly am, he instantly enters my being.11:32 am

I don’t care.  I said what I said and I was right too.  Now I’d better calm down because we’ll get there soon and she’ll be grieving.  And I’ll help her.  I can save her, sort out her insurance and she’ll be grateful. She’ll say she couldn’t imagine what she would have done without me.  She’ll say thank you.  She’ll say are you blue? Who the hell are you?

Krishna:  Me?  I’m  Krishna.  I’ll be your driver.

What the hell is happening?  Did everything just stop?  What’s going on?

Krishna:  I changed the now moment.  You are used to a, what’s that word?  Kinch, a knife blade.  A now infinitely thin separating past from future.  I gave the now extension without duration.

What does that mean?  It’s like you pressed a pause button or something.

Krishna:  Ok.  If that works for you.  I paused time.

What?  Why?

Krishna:  Because you need help.  You are headed for a fall of your own creation.  You are laboring under an illusion and I’m here to tell you that creation leads to dissolution and back again.  And again.  That’s how it goes.

Look.  Help me out here.  I’m just going to see a widow to help her through a life insurance issue.  Goodness of my heart.  Change her future for the better.

Krishna:  Right.  Purely altruistic.  I see you.  I can see that you are performing this action with the expectation of a particular outcome.  A particularly flattering to you outcome.  I’m saying let it go.  Help the woman, go ahead.  But stop thinking about what may result from it.  Do your duty and let it go.

But looking down the road for her, her prospects

Krishna:  What road?  There is no road.  There’s no now and later.  Time is static, man.  It does not have uni-directional flow.  It can’t be perceived, just inferred from motion and change.

No.  I’m not going to listen to some blue man groupie.  You’re the driver?  Then drive on buddy.  I have a widow to visit.  Are you sticking your tongue out at me?  Wait, weren’t you a guy?  Who are you now?

Letting on to be awfully deeply interested in nothing

But they will teach us that Eternity is the Standing still of the Present Time, a Nunc-stans (as the Schools call it;) which neither they, nor any else understand, no more than they would a Hic-stans for an Infinite greatness of Place.

5:40 pm

This place is filled with bugs.  Look at that one there in the corner.  Oh wow, that’s a spider eating another spider.  No wait, not eating.  Well, that’s natural.  Told Joe I could wait for the money he owes me if he would talk to Myles about the Keyes ad.  He won’t do it.  Look at those spiders.  Right here with us, living lives.  Mating.  Sharing our houses strangers to us.  What civilization do they have, I wonder.  They crawl so close over everything we have, everything we’ve made.  Our art, our literature, our beds.  And we busy with our moderation and botheration and civilization and syphilisation to be much to them but goodfornothing gods lighting sideways on their lives smushing them so you wouldn’t see a trace of them after and leave them for our dogs to devour or wipe them off with something and into the trash with you, honey.  And here are these two in the corner just in time to be late to know that somebody will smash them before they are done and well, that’s natural.  Obliterated to nothingness.  Well, not nothingness.  Nothing is not nothing.  Think about zero, yeah?  What is it but a place holder.  It makes things clearer in writing down numbers so 1132 can be seen right away as different from 11032.  Zero is a quantity of nothing.  Until you try to divide something by zero.  Then nothing turns into something pretty quick.  It becomes a whole lot of something, infinite something.  Suddenly nothing is everything.  Those spiders are nothing.  Those spiders are the kings of infinite space.

Dominenamine

In search of whom they sought: him there they found squat like a toad, close at the ear of Eve; Assaying by his devilish art to reach the organs of her Fancy, and with them forge illusions as he list, phantasms and dreams, or if, inspiring venom, he might taint th' animal spirits that from pure blood arise like gentle breaths from rivers pure, thence raise at least distempered, discontented thoughts, vain hopes, vain aims, inordinate desires blown up with high conceits engend'ring pride. 11:32 am

I thought I heard a toad whispering into my ear.  That is how the dream began.  It was a strange dream or nightmare, I do not understand which, of a place I have never seen and people looking unlike anybody within the walls of our dear abbey.  I sensed that the toad was most troubled.  I have spoken with many creatures but never with a toad, so I am not certain of his words or meanings, but he had a fluent croak.  Werburgh.  Werburgh.  My name came forth from his bulbous throat most naturally.  I am uncertain, but I believe he may have shifted his appearance, for at times I thought he resembled a bulldog.  Or a sheep.  Even a rook.  Oh the things he showed me disturbed me greatly.  I saw a coffin and mourners, but they were strangely dressed and the poor deceased had not a full mass, merely the absolution and that was all for to send the dear pitiable creature to our eternal Father.  Oh how I shall pray for that sweet soul!  The toad then whispered into my ear a most grievous vision; a man of dour countanence, not of our faith, improperly kneeling and unable to pray.  Within his thoughts he held such little understanding of the sacred rites we hold so dear, and he occupied his mind most shockingly with the flesh of his wife puffed with air.  I can hardly bring myself to see it.  Then most dreadfully he imagined the light which might come from igniting air released by the desecration of tombs long sealed!  I grieve greatly for the everlasting soul of this wretched man who damages himself with his thoughts.  How I tremble for the future of our existence as I believe this was the purpose of the wise dear toad.  He showed me such disturbing revelations of what is surely to be the second fall of man so that perhaps with piety and prayer we can change the miserable lot of our wretched future bretheren.  I see now my friends the wild geese in their pond.  We shall cook the fat one in a pie this evening and tomorrow I shall gather its feathers and bones and resurrect the dear creature.  That is, if the rest of them give me their solemn promise to stay out of the cornfield.